Have you ever had one of those days when you and your husband just simply do not speak the same language? When it seems like he is on one planet, and you another, and you are trying to communicate with tin cans and a string like the old game of Telephone? When you both rephrase, start over, get frustrated, rephrase again and finally one of you just clams up and walks, or storms, away in a huff?
It pains me to say this is absolutely normal; every marriage goes through a time – or several times – when communication is at a standstill. There is no magical Happily-Ever-After drink, we have to learn to communicate the old fashioned way – with patience, self control and a tender heart towards the man we love.
The biggest challenge I have is not letting those old biddies Bitterness, Anger, Frustration and Blame start yapping at me in my head. I know that once you start a conversation with those sinful creatures they convince you to say and do things that you absolutely know are unnecessary, ridiculous and completely unfair. Oh, and let’s not forget that old friendship with I’m-Always-Right. She’s trouble with a capital T and she seems to visit frequently with an enticing tray of poison-filled cookies.
So if we know these biddies are nasty, why are they so easy to fall into step with? Why do we let the Devil convince us to hang out with them again?
For me it comes down to a lack of self control. Proverbs 25:28 says “A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.” That is exactly how I feel after a disagreement with my hubby – no matter how small. And honestly, I feel this way more often when it was me who pushed that proverbial red button. The hardest thing to do is face my husband to ask forgiveness again for hanging out with I’m-Always-Right, and those other old biddies.
I’m grateful to know that when I call out for help, the Spirit will provide and blessed beyond measure to know that because God is part of our marriage, my husband always forgives.